Burnout, Covid, and the Need for a New Organizational System

Post 1: The Crash

So it's March 2020

I'm just back from a trip to Tokyo as this Covid-19 thing is starting to get serious. I'm told to quarantine at home for two weeks. I wouldn't step foot into the office again except in November to pick up the stuff that had been on my desk.

I'm worried for the future, and the pandemic has put me in survival mode. My goals and ambitions start to fall away as my main goal becomes "get through this day I'm in right now" as opposed to "make a move each day that will better the future."

2020-2022: Complete Burnout

I experienced complete and total burnout in the months to come. I stopped making anything, both tech and crafting. I spent my time slogging through work or trying to sleep. It wasn't a good time for anyone, and I fell especially far into this pit.

How I burned out

I actually think a number of factors attributed to my burnout-- obviously the pandemic and the subsequent upheaval of my and everyone's daily life was a factor. Going from constantly on the road to always being home, and my partner transitioning to work-from-home, was a jump that took some getting used to. Luckily we moved into a bigger home in November 2020 which gave us both some personal space, a much needed change.

I also think I was burning the candle at both ends a little bit-- I was away more than home in 2019; despite my wedding being that same year, and the wedding took a lot out of me as I had to do most of the planning away from home. Being on the road constantly (I took a trip for the entire month of June 2019, for example) was taking more of a toll on me than I cared to admit.

I actually had a mild breakdown in September 2019 that may have marked the real start of my burnout. I ended up in a Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) for two weeks. The day after I left the program, I was on a plane to Europe. That should've been a sign.

Please note that my work at the time was very helpful and nice and it was only me pushing myself-- I take full responsibility for the actions that led to my burnout. I'm learning how to say no more and not have so many projects rotating at once now.

My organization system

To call it a system is a bit of a reach here-- it was a very simple setup.

In the evening, I'd look at the day's tasks; anything I hadn't completed was moved to the next day, and I would scan the day's notes for new tasks to add. I'd put my schedule in for the entire week on Sunday (I do Monday week start). I don't have goals written down anymore to pull tasks from, and all my tasks come from the notes of the day.

The ups

This is a very good organization system for someone entirely in survival mode
I got enough done using this system that my loving husbeast and my work didn't get mad at me.
The system kept me feeling safe in knowing that I was at least adulting enough that everything wouldn't fall apart.

The downs

I didn't have a mechanism for due dates, projects, or anything really.
This system left me in the dark when it came to context (why am I doing this again?)
I had no goals or reviews set up to see my progress over time

So now it's February 2022

I'm leaving the burnout in stages, I'm willing to create things again. I feel like I have a lot left to do on my skills attainment and learning. And I find my current organization system woefully under-equipped for the task.